Kerry ’08 (Rage, rage against…)?

Today’s Globe has an article that says Kerry could ‘conceivably’ run again in four more years. Superificialy, we can see parallels with Vice President Gore, returning to the arena with his proverbial boxing gloves primed for a rematch, which leads me to wonder: how will the Republicans treat Kerry if he reemerges at the top of the Democratic field? Everyone else?

A. The Republicans

Dick Cheney: Let’s not forget that this is a man who called my daughter a lesbian.
Mary Cheney: But, Daddy, I am a–
Dick Cheney: Shut up, sweetie, the terrorists have bombs everywhere.
Mary Cheney: Don’t you mean ears?
Dick Cheney: Ears made of bombs.

B. Everyone Else

Announcer: And now, Gov. Bill Richardson!
Audience: (Applauds, cheers)
Horatio Sanz: Thank you, thank you. (Places hands on lecturn.) Tonight, we gather in the land we left four years ago to nominate once more John Forbes Kerry for President Of The United States! (Wolfs down three tacos.)
Audience: (For a change of pace: cheers, applauds.)
Horatio Sanz: (Gnawing on a butterball turkey, food drops from his mouth, provoking audience laughter) And now, layees an’ hentlemen, John Kerry!
(The actual John Kerry emerges, nodding, smiling, ocassionally extending a hand and pointing at someone. He raises his hand to his head.)
John Kerry: I’m John Kerry, and I’m reporting for duty, which is derived from the middle english “duete” and the french due, though you probably don’t care about that, because live, from NEW YORK, IT’S SATURDAY NIGHT!
Audience: (Goes wild.)

I was outside Fanueil Hall when Kerry conceded the election. Crowds of people had stuffed themselves together in front of the building and across the street, constantly straining their necks to peer at officials and guards milling around out front. To see how the crowd lauded his arrival, broke down in tears during a speech that had some of the most moving passages I’d ever heard, to hear cries of outrage at the line “there won’t be enough outstanding votes for us to be able to win Ohio,” and listen to folks shout, “We’re sorry, but we love you!” and push forward like arms out of broken hearts wiggling forward to grasp and tug someone closer and in face to face makes me think there’s still palpable, poppin’ passion (I get paid ten cents extra for every alliteration) in the Democratic Party. Let’s hope Kerry, with others, can pull a Dylan Thomas. And die of alcohol poisoning. Wait, I mean–!

[Transmission terminated.]

4 Comments so far

  1. Cassford (unregistered) on November 10th, 2004 @ 12:06 pm

    “Let’s hope Kerry, with others, can pull a Dylan Thomas.”

    I thought about this and thought about this and I don’t get it. Die of alcohol poisoning? Seriously, what do you mean?

  2. evan (unregistered) on November 10th, 2004 @ 12:55 pm

    Oh, yeah, I’d totally love to have the democratic party die of alcohol poisoning.

    I meant, “Rage, rage against the dying of the light.”

  3. Cassford (unregistered) on November 12th, 2004 @ 11:59 am

    Doh. I didn’t get the reference in the title.

  4. evan (unregistered) on November 12th, 2004 @ 12:53 pm

    Bah, s’okay. I edited it, anyways ;-).

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